Thank you to everyone who has called or emailed or posted on facebook etc. your comments of love and support though the past three weeks. It is so heartening feel your compassion for me and for Jimmy. Love you guys!
I'm sorry it's been so long since a post. I know those of you who actually read this thing have been waiting for me to write something. The truth is, I haven't been able to sit down long enough it seems, to get everything out on paper like I wanted to. So now, if you have the time, here is the story of Jimmy...
Okay, so Sunday April 26 we had our C-section. I would have loved to have an epidural before they actually took me down to the OR...but because of how the epidural was when I had Elise, we had to use a Spinal instead.
What happened with Elise?? The epidural was spotty because of the scar tissue from my back surgery in 2000 so in the middle of the procedure I began to feel the pain of being cut open etc. That led to more and more medication to try to get me to not feel the operation, which led to me not remembering the first moments of my daughter's birth. I didn’t want that to happen again, so we went for the spinal, which doesn’t last as long as an epidural, but has a heavier hit.
After I received the spinal, they began the procedure and in a matter of seconds, there was Jimmy! 3lbs. 1 oz., and 17 inches long! His lungs were fine too!! The problems we foresaw were really taken care of by the blessings and prayers from everyone…and of course, the steroids.
He was taken, and Brian went with him immediately to the NICU for his recovery. I later learned he would stay there until certain criteria were met:
At least 4lbs.
Regulated consistent temperature
Able to breast or bottle feed exclusively
Brian came back and stayed with me in my recovery. The recovery started off WAY better than my previous pregnancy. There was no internal uterine bleeding, and instead of being in the recovery room for 8 hours, we were there for a couple of hours, almost 3. They only had to do compressions twice, instead of twenty times. The bad part of the recovery was when the spinal wore off and I was left to the IV medication.
I should say, for those of you who do not know…in the past ten years, I’ve been put under for various medical procedures over 10 times, and have built up a very maddening and exceptional tolerance to medication.
The pitocin or however you spell it, was administered and without the spinal’s effects, I was beginning to feel the contractions that happen to shrink everything back into place. I like to think I can handle pain pretty well. I do. Visceral pain though is a different animal than what I’ve dealt with the majority of my life…so I’m not sure whether I am really a big baby or what. Anyway, they gave me dilutdad (again, not sure of the spelling) the strongest medication they were permitted to give me. By the end of my couple of hours with the nurse, she said to Brian and I that she had never given so much of this medication to someone and was able to have a conversation…that one more injection should put me into a coma! We were talking and interacting without any problems except the pain I continued to have. After my few hours there, they brought me up to my permanent recovery room.
The next 3 days were really difficult for me pain-wise. More so, I think emotionally it was difficult because Jimmy wasn’t in a bassinet next to my bed. I was having all this pain and not sleeping, and not seeing the fruit of my labor. That was hard. That continues to be hard, because he’s still not home, and it’s May 14.
I finally got to see Jimmy and hold him for a minute and try to feed him. He didn’t know how to suck-swallow-breathe, and that meant he had to have a tube inserted through his nose to his stomach so milk could be given to him. I was really upset that his first meal was formula, not breast milk. He was in an incubator and stayed there until he could regulate his temperature. That took a few days. They took him out, and the next day had to put him back in because he couldn’t maintain his temperature. It was really frustrating to think you were moving forward and really weren’t.
I wasn’t allowed to breast feed him, only nuzzle. Nuzzling meant, as he received his milk through his tube, he could be at my breast, but not get his meal from me.
On Mother’s Day, they finally let me feed him without the tube. He’s been having regular sessions with me in the morning and with Brian in the evening. He was regulating his temp, he met his 4 lb. requirement and things were looking good until yesterday. They told me he caught a virus from the twins beside him. He’s currently in isolation, and will stay there until he gets well, which they said could be up to a week. I’m not sure anymore how long he’ll be there. No one thought he’d be there this long. His nurse Bernie, keeps telling me she jinxed him by telling me how long she thought he’d stay. She says she never tells anyone anything like that because she doesn’t want to say it and it not be accurate…
So, I’ll continue to go every morning at 4 a.m. to breast feed him. Brian will go at night at 8 p.m. to bottle feed him…and hopefully they’ll be able to use their discretion to move him completely to what they call nippling, or completely bottle/breast fed.
I’ll try to be better at posting for you all. Thanks again for all of your thoughts and prayers!!
--terrah
